The Brothers Karamazov is a passionate philosophical novel set in 19th-century Russia, that enters deeply into the ethical debates of God, free will, and morality. It is a spiritual drama of moral struggles concerning faith, doubt, judgment, and reason, set against a modernizing Russia, with a plot which revolves around the subject of patricide. Dostoyevsky composed much of the novel in Staraya Russa, which inspired the main setting. Since its publication, it has been acclaimed as one of the supreme achievements in world literature.

The plot of the novel revolves around the murder of perhaps one of the most despicable characters ever created, Fyodor Karamazov, the father of the Karamazov brothers. This plot serves as the basic architecture for Dostoevsky's philosophy, touching on all the Really Big Questions. Do we have free will? Does God exist? Why do human beings have to suffer? What is the nature of human nature? Are there limits to human reason? Are we bound by moral laws? How do we achieve happiness?

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The Brothers Karamazov is one of those Greatest Novels Ever. You're supposed to gush over how wonderful it is – which really doesn't help you appreciate it, does it? For those of us who don't make a habit of contemplating the abyss of human existence over a glass of chilled vodka, Dostoevsky's magnum opus can be a tall order.
But let's not dismiss the novel as a handy doorstop just yet. The Brothers Karamazov is so huge that it has enough room for any mood or occasion. A few examples:

Situation 1: You've over-texted to the point where, instead of human faces, you just see emoticons. You find yourself momentarily nostalgic for complete sentences. Then you find yourself Tweeting about this nostalgia.
BK: Characters speak passionately, and at length, about their hopes, fears, and passions. Reading the novel is like entering into the most fascinating, absorbing, juicy conversation you've ever had.

Situation 2: Big Brother. Flavor of Love. Keeping Up With The Kardashians. Just when you think they've exhausted ways to humiliate people, they come up with yet another one. Jersey Shore. You find yourself nauseated by the spectacle, but it's also a guilty pleasure and you just can't turn away.
BK: There's plenty humiliation to go around in this novel. If you want to know how low people can go, well, it's pretty low (without giving away the plot, check out Fyodor and Stinking Lizaveta). While you may not lose your taste for trashy television, you might understand the appeal a little better.

Situation 3: You've just finished one of those conversations with your brother/sister/mother/father that makes you wonder whether you're swimming in the same gene pool.
BK: The Karamazovs are a wildly disparate, quarrelsome bunch – yet they all share, in some way, the basic Karamazovian lust for life. Their conflicts with each other drive the novel's plot.

Situation 4: You're at a point in your life where you need to go on a quest, ninja-style. You're thinking Christian Bale in The Dark Knight or that really buff guy from 300.
BK: Every ninja-quest tough guy needs a guru, so let The Brothers Karamazov be your guide. Be tempted by the Grand Inquisitor and ponder the words of the elder Zosima. Experiment with being a Dmitri, an Ivan, or an Alyosha.

Situation 5: You find yourself unexpectedly teetering on an existential abyss.
BK: The Brothers Karamazov has just enough heft to keep you (hopefully) from falling in.