Lisa Manterfield was a sensible 32-year-old when she met The One—a man who sparked a passion for tango, an urge to break down closed doors, and a deep-rooted desire to reproduce. Five years later she was a baby addict, hiding her addiction, plotting a maternity ward heist, and threatening anything that got in her way, including her beloved husband and his pesky practicality.

In this gritty, award-winning memoir, Manterfield traces her spiraling route from rational 21st-century woman to desperate mama-wannabe. She examines the siren song of motherhood, the insidious lure of the fertility industry, and the repercussions of being childless in a mom-centric society. But this isn’t just another infertility story with another miracle baby ending, nor is it a sad introspective of a childless woman; this is a story about love, desire, and choices—and ultimately about hope. It is the story of a woman who escapes her addiction, not with a baby, but with her sanity, her marriage, and her sense-of-self intact.

2012 Independent Publishers Book Awards winner.